Playing Catch-up

So, yesterday was an über productive day, one of the best yet since I left my job at the newspaper. Oh, and yes, it has been a month and a half since that happened! What have I been up to then, you might ask yourself. Well, simply put, I’ve been playing catch-up! As I worked yesterday I finally felt like I was getting on top of things. I finally felt like, “hey, this is what it might feel like to be in business for myself!” I woke up early, I had a healthy breakfast, I answered all my email. I returned phone calls promptly. I edited and edited and edited some more. I took a few breaks to walk the dogs and I met a friend for coffee. AND, I did 2, count them TWO extra projects last night into the wee hours.

FAST FORWARD to THIS morning… I was a wreck. I couldn’t wake up, I felt all icky from that late night snack (read: spicy chicken dog), I didn’t care that I had told friends I would help them out with something today. It was all of the things I despise in a morning, rolled into one messy mess. Once I finally got out of bed, all groggy, I wandered into the kitchen and waiting for me on the floor was a little surprise…from Abbey (and it wasn’t little). Yes, that is a euphemism for a pile of dog poop! (Abbey is my 4-year-old Rhodesian Ridgeback.)

I could have been all bent out of shape about it, considering my mood already, instead it put in stark-relief how life has been lately (and always is, really); It’s a series of ups and downs. And, life as a small business owner is exactly the same, only heightened.

Yesterday was definitely an up day. But, this hasn’t been the case for much of the past month. I’ve spent the time since I left my steady job doing a LOT and not just a lot of work, but a lot of play too. Throughout this time though, I’ve mostly been feeling like I’m failing. Failing because: i didn’t wake up at dawn to begin working; i’m not editing night and day and day and night to finish all of the work and projects on my plate; i’m not communicating well with clients, potential clients, friends, family, my dogs; i haven’t blogged enough; i haven’t updated my website; i haven’t made “proper” business decisions; i haven’t been eating well; I haven’t worked out enough, etcetera!

And so, instead of telling myself, “Hey! Enough! You are doing everything you wanted to do and everything you can right now. Relax!” I’ve done something very typical for me, I’ve become anxious, overly-sensitive and I’ve put even the littlest of things off. That’s turned into a cycle and it feels icky and has caused me to feel like I’m in a constant state of catch-up! Sigh…deep breath.

Well, yesterday I did say, “enough.” And, it was good.

Then the poop happened. But, even when poop happens, I know I need to clean it up and move on, keep going, and get. it. done.

So, on that note, I’ll push forward. In the next few days I’ll not play catchup, but just get caught up and I will catch YOU up on what I’ve been doing!  I went to Big Sur for my Aunt Ruth’s 80th birthday celebration; I went to Vegas with James, him mom, brother and sister-in-law; photographed a wedding; I photographed a style shoot; AND I decided to get an office…outside my house!

In the coming days I’ll blog about each of these really exciting adventures and how I’m doing with staying on top of all of everything! For now, I’ll leave you with this:

 

Parker puppies 1.5 years old.

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Abbey dogs (who turned 4 on August 10), also known as “poop dogs” for the reasons stated above.

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{hearts}

Kathryn

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